I remember when invitations weren’t impersonal mass emails

22 Jan

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photo by Christine TM

I have a confession. While I love parties, there is one part that I don’t like: the moment when I receive the evite and I have to come up with some clever line for the RSVP section. This is made exponentially worse if the host has taken the time to come up with a witty description and bitingly clever RSVP categories. You know what I’m talking about: instead of “Yes, Maybe, and No” your funniest-guy-in-the-room host might have substituted, “I have the perfect outfit, What’s in it for me?, and I’m washing my hair that day.” Or my friend Julia’s Stupids and Cupids Valentine’s Day Dance options that harkened back to seventh grade note-passing: “Check Yes, Check Maybe, and Check No.”

Then I feel obliged to waste 7 minutes of my life trying to think of something original to write in this cruel game of online oneupmanship. Since when did declining an invitation become a public event? And how awkward is it when you don’t know a lot of the other invited guests?

While I applaud those who have reached into the depths of their creative souls to craft ingenious responses, I’m taking this opportunity to announce that I’m officially out of the game. From now on, here’s my stock reply: “I’m afraid I won’t make it to your party because I’m too busy writing clever evite RSVPs.”


5 Responses to “I remember when invitations weren’t impersonal mass emails”

  1. joannameng January 22, 2009 at 9:17 pm #

    Yes! This phenomenon is representative of a common modern dilemma…. How much time should I spend crafting a response or writing a comment? Is it worse to look like I spent too much time on this or to not seem like I have a sense of humor? If I write something quick will it seem abrupt and off-putting, or will I just look cooler than everyone because I’m too busy to deal with this nonsense?

  2. hannahkane January 24, 2009 at 7:06 pm #

    Totally agree, joannameng. That’s why I’m going meta. We need to get this out in the open! We should all just acknowledge that we feel this way, so that none of us has to feel alone. 🙂

  3. juliacsmith January 27, 2009 at 3:31 am #

    Nail on the head, HK. Consider me on board with your RSVP-lution.

  4. Matt Koltermann July 21, 2009 at 1:44 pm #

    OMG, totally! Although, I have to say your LaToya to Trish’s Evite was pretty witty 🙂

    • hannahkane July 21, 2009 at 2:33 pm #

      Maybe from now on, if I can’t attend, I’ll say “I’m sorry, I have to pull a LaToya.”

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